I’ve been typing and deleting words for this blog over and over again. I’ve written in the middle of the night, waking up in London at 3am, thinking that I just found the right words – but they were written in an emotional half asleep state that I didn’t want to publish them. So I deleted and wrote a new version, another late hour after coming home from a night with friends and got all emotional again. So I deleted them once more. How can you address your personal feelings in public without sounding like you were fishing for support, when you don’t even have real problems. I read stories of other people’s lives all around the globe and fate and think how can I even think that I’m having troubles in life – don’t be such a loser and stop whining. Look at my life. It would be total hypocritical and self beweeping to post such a set of photographs and say it actually makes me sad.
Maybe I have to say just one thing – Life through the lens is never showing all sides, especially when you have to select the images, decide which ones to show. You can always pretend having a great life when you highlight only the moments where it seems like it. We all have a long fight ahead, a fight to be heard, accepted and rewarded for what we do in life and it’s sometimes hard not to give it all up and say fuck it. I try to stay honest and personal, documenting my life but it’s just that perspective of how I want to see it. So it’s always a sugarcoated version. Like, I don’t take many photos of the things I don’t look at. Life is not a fairy tale and I will try even more to include that in my work.
But now, let the photos do the talk.
back in august. the gspusi days. selfies are not my thing. I don't like taking them. this is an exception. It was a happy moment crossing the street. No time to adjust to the camera. I didn't tell her, I just took it. It wasn't set up to look happy. I think the way many people photograph themselves today shows how self centered and superficial we've become. Today people actually see their faces on the screen while they take their selfies and they take hundreds of versions to publish only the one they like the most and this just adds to the fake virtual reality.
I had another shot on the roll, so I went for another one. It's interesting how expressions change, once you're aware of being photographed.
you don't see it often that someone buys a 16mm camera these days.
since my hexar is resting in peace since half a year and my 35mm lens for the leica was broken... I had to go wtih my 21mm lens - but I just think it's too wide for my work... at least it made me use the rolleiflex a little more again.
it's in the eyes
when there is one thing you need but didn't bring...
waiting in the staircase for the rain to end (used that Konica S2 again)
dinner with dad
it's in the DNA
this is what I think of 2016
no make up, no time to prepare, not even coffee yet
a man with a sad story
hashtag vs real life
puntigammer connection
Back when everything was new, exciting and undefined. I didn't know what I was doing. Only now I can see it's true quality. Looking at the photo doesn't make me have a connection to that moment. That's something new and refreshing to me. As if there was a magnetic field around this piece that just gets stronger the closer I'm trying to get to her. To me this photo leaves so much freedom to interpretation, yet when I look closely it tells me much about her. Having so many clear photos of my life, often makes it hard to keep a memory that is not attached or even dictated by the photos I take. When you love someone and take their photo, doesn't mean that you can capture this love with the photo, all you do is remind for yourself: this what it looked like. Not with this one, it's more than just a simple reminder of a brief moment.
back to where I belong
another dad-dinner
when laura meets minu
and bon voyage to paris!
coffee with yaeger
coffee with waelti
that last minute deodorant
adopting to the new severin having a hexar again, meaning I'm taking a shit load of photos again (thanks fabain for borrowing it bro!)
make yourself happy
witnessing the birth of a macbook air
well, it works as a mirror too
welcome to apple
wondering what's the world out there...
welcome to vienna
the days before the chairs
business on the phone
the most expensive way to eat an apple
train to hainburg
switching sides
old fellas
photo by Julia
some piglets were born
these two didn't survive the night
so they were buried
risotto time
when you have a hairdesser in the family
one photo left on the roll
when a great personality meets that last half hour of daylight.
thank you for being so awesome Marcus
it's hard to believe that my mother on the right, is the grandmother of Emily on the left.
ready for taking off
when family meets
those big eyes
when a long barkeeping era ends.
to the other side of family
better to be on the safe side
pre-digesting
before the play
after the play
on the bike with padre
urban jungle
good session with Patrick Pat Schlegel
waiting for that forelle
back from italy, back to life
no pain no gain
aufstrich
best of 3
the first good bye
gleich gehts los
for the last time
for the first time
tattoo selfie
more festhalten..
love my hood
lower austria is not vegan
ice cream
fucking liars! (when there is no chocolate on the ice cream)
love girl gangs
the photo session with the one and only swintha was looong due
the tram was actually moving, so the shadows changed really quick. one shot and I'm glad it turned out.
that famous laughter. I can hear you Swintha!
so much to choose from
at prosi, exotic supermarket
when you have something in common
attitude
getting ready for holidays. lots of catfood, negatives from the lab to scan, blueberries and new camera. interesting bag too
economic cat
getting to know the AT1
spö party
got whatsapp?
when you have a sentence in mind when you take a photo. you know which one.
experimenting "cunts"
getting clean in athens
father and daughter at mama roux (nice day for a panf)
shooting the shooter
whose fault?
At Aliki's. Really wish we would have found the time for some portraits. next time!
when you end up in a place you'd normally not go but need the toilet. so we stayed for a tea. switched to portra800 so I can take something with me.
the way down to the toilets
never used portra800 in sunny condition. it's a great film I've to say - but pricey.
last minute printing documents for the new life in germany.
after quite a walk to the second hand place, she found no satisfaction. sorry for posting ;)
so we got some sweets to dry the tears
behind the scenes
almost missed our ferry because these kittens got our attention for a while
leaving the harbor
some strange island on the way
pick up area
ferry rides are like time holes
arriving
anticipation
hello serifos!
checking the tan
it was a bit rainy at first
first dinner.
Julia always took ages to compose, focus and decide when to take the photo. It's also normal when you just started shooting film.. I still found it really amusing when she just stood there and took so much time to take a photo. she took good photos though, so all worth the wait.
did I say a bit? that day we spent inside
good to have a great airbnb in this case
one of the greatest views on the island
all white
a cute couple at yacht club
arriving at one of the most beautiful beaches of the island
one afternoon I took the moto to a place we've passed a few days before. back then I didn't bring my camera to save film. So that day I went back and reached the place when the light was just perfect. Nobody was around. What a great scenery.
getting back to yacht club after an amazing ride with the bike
always wondered what f22 at minimum focus distance looks like on the rolleiflex.
never knew ducks went to greece
beautiful shot by Julia
shaving
our little house was just perfect..
after we had no more motorbikes, we walked. the wind was blowing the map away - time for a photo.
we were walking between the bushes. I saved my roll for the last sunlight.
that day, with nobody around. it felt like the island was ours
these planes were circling the island a few times. on our way back I took that shot.
Julia ran out of film with the canon and really wanted to take that shot and I think this is again worth sharing!
both starving, we entered one of the first taverns we found
the serifos days were almost over.. we decided to take some last photos
the first time we saw that basketball court, we knew we'd take photos there
I wanted to get a different perspective, so I woke the monkey in me
receiving good news from the other life
it's funny. I've never been truly satisfied with the photos I took of her. it's almost that I'm afraid of reaching that point where I say, that's the one.
another way to secure your moto
the serifos days were over
back in athens
our bags. the last photo
back in the vienna appartment. having a new guest
as we streched the holidays to the maximum, Julia was preparing her move to Munich the next day.
everyone still half asleep
riding the baby chair
finally some coffee enlightenment
happy birthday
spaghetti dance
bye bye little shooting star!
the essentials
fast forward to munich.
only the most important books
a new world record attempt in doing laundry in a day
not much else left to do
homeless in munich, the holy bible and an oktoberfest hat.
the weather made us stay inside all day
on the way back to vienna. were the extra 10km worth that service area?
pipi pause in the rain
back in viennas orient express
mister gesso
this is not banana juice
sharing is caring
waiting for the husband
fast forward to piccadilly line
london. popstars are waiting
just once, I wanted that typical shot
she found her shirt
smelling that chicken all day
bam oida nice light
soho what else
more kimbo product placement
haribo macht kinder froh
hashtagcaps
Laura Owens at her show in front of her works
art people
last visitors
when daddy is your superhero
..blog entry?
rethink what a phone can do - like exploding?
wicked mom
sorry not sorry
only if avedon could see this
"gravity is overrated"
that building never ceases to amaze me. i took a very similar shot about 12 years ago.. not sure if i can find that file again... shot with canon powershot a40 back then..
everytime I see school uniforms, it triggers me. (no pun intended)
at tate restaurant
preparing for that middle finger
chloé and francesca, my new italian friends
a brief moment
camouflage books
although we never met. this one is for you henry/i
a quick look at frieze art fair
everyone seems important
flower should make you happy
just a reminder how fucked up the world is
the treasure
more picturesque homeless
milk shot
view from my way overpriced hotel room
A United Kingdom, sounds paradox these days.
this is all about expressions
not the animal video dodo kind
so close you can almost taste it
that Reiter Raabe, Richter and Oehlen shot
I ran out of film. All that was left were some frames on a apx100 roll.. and I end up in this crowded underground. So I just thought f2.0 1/30th let's give it a try.
I actually took this crowded train the wrong way, because I was so drawn to the scene that I took photos and forgot to check the direction. So I went back and did the same all over again in another packed subway.
found some kodak trix - saved me once again.
scenes like these I try to capture. street photography is not just a series of spectacular juxtapositions and splits of seconds, not to me.
there are so many kinds of parents
back at frieze art fair. this time I spent a little more time to dive in that coterie.
meanwhile in regents park
well.. it's never ending.. so after an hour outside, it was time to get in.
enjoy the tour
on my way to frieze masters
the evolution of the book
hanging around with some picassos
the beauty of exhaustion
on the way to the airport
back in vienna. surprised to see Julia, although life just crossed for a very short moment. once again, last shot and no more rolls left... then i checked there was still 10 frames in the Konica S2.
getting a bite before taking the train again.
that S2 I bought for 30€ is a really cool camera.
trinken hilft.
cafe industrie another place where time stood still
Jacqueline on the decks
woracziczky, beim besten wirten mit dem bro!
does it make sense?
giulia, new home
feeling the plush
new way to get fat
preparing home cinema
busride to graz
oh the irony
offline banking
you can tell, it's an italian place
Julia at work
every theatre as a smokehouse
in
and out
Tamara in the boy is mine
hello chairholder
Julia's frame
partnerlook
a view I just like to remember
spinning
Empire by Milo Rau. all I can say is thank you. I felt so humbled by this play.
the play left me in a very sad mood. I don't know why they posed like that for someone else, I just instinctively took the photo. the antithetic to how I felt.
broken glasses
another good bye
she's got the looks
hotdog angels
a party night ahead
next day. recovering.
claudia and the whole world behind her
crime scene
the last nice day in austria
here the story ends
I keep documenting my life like an addict. I try to find truth in the photos I take and I while I look at them I’m realizing it is the same story again. The difference is that it just looks different. I lose friends and I find new ones, I get to see places and I have to leave again and by taking photos you fool yourself in believing you can’t lose them. I’ve been doing this the last 10 years now. Sometimes I wonder what life would be like without having all these photos. How would I memorize my life without them. My head is exploding with all these memories attached to these photos. All I do is freeze time, like homages to moments, homages to people in my life. It’s a gift and it’s a burden at the same time. It’s harder to let go, It’s harder to accept things that changed, when you have such beautiful reminders you can look at. These photographs have no power to change anything. I feel betrayed by them, I feel naive thinking I could preserve things. Photos don’t have that power. They just take you back in time where you can’t go back, all in your imagination. When I started doing all this more than 10 years ago, I wasn’t prepared to reach this point of overstraining.
you made my day!! Sehr schoen, besonders die Rollei’s Frames! Jetzt warte ich schon auf Dezember Blog :) gruesse
Comment by Domagoj — November 12, 2016 @ 10:00 amThe blog becomes more and more a photographic version of a Knausgaard book. I like it. A lot. Looking forward to the next 10 years. Cheers!
Comment by Kay — November 12, 2016 @ 1:56 pmLong time visitor, first time commenter.
I like your street work but I especially like your personal work and the way it seems to come naturally. I have a hard time with that, but every time I see your portraits or moments with friends it makes me want to keep trying.
I’ve always enjoyed your pictures, but for some reason today, those very personal shots resonated differently with me (in a good way)
cheers
Comment by Jerome — November 12, 2016 @ 6:42 pmhttp://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/serifos_5/MF13328.jpg
Comment by Cheep — November 15, 2016 @ 5:00 pmhttp://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/muenchen_umzug/Img61317.jpg
http://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/london_1/img61578.jpghttp://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/london_2/Img61540.jpg
http://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/london_3/Img61565.jpghttp://severinkoller.at/blog/wp-content/gallery/london_wien/Img61512.jpg
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Hi, Severin! What kind of scanner do You use to scan your negatives? V700?
Cheers!
BB
Comment by BB — November 17, 2016 @ 1:31 amYour words moved me, your pictures even more.
We are all desperately trying to hold on to these fleeting moments that seem to rush past us, leaving hardly any impression. We humans live in these brief periods where everything is new and fascinating, the first day or week in an unfamiliar place, and then it all drowns into sameness. For most people years slip by without anything to hold onto. We photographers are privileged, we keep looking up when everyone else just stares at the ground rushing to the next appointment. We stretch time with it, make certain moments last a little bit longer also in the process of capturing them. And although we gain certain magical power over these moments, we still can’t prevent them from slipping away in the end. We are left with something more concrete than fleeting impressions and this can be good. But then sometimes when we stole some moments that we can’t relive, the pictures become like open wounds. Don’t despair over them. Just be happy that you managed to create something beautiful, even if it hurts.
Keep stretching time, move on to the next roll, you’ll be fine.
Comment by Lilly Schwartz — November 17, 2016 @ 9:13 amMir ist aufgefallen dass ich tatsächlich seit 2006 deinen Blog lese. Wüsste sonst keine Seite die mich seit so langer Zeit so packt jedesmal. Grüße aus Nürnberg-
as always <3.
Comment by seb — November 17, 2016 @ 9:51 amSeverin, dass ist dein schönster Blogeintrag.
Du erzählst wunderbare Alltagsgeschichten, teilst Freude, Trauer, Leid und vor allem Intime Momente.
Ich glaube, wir alle die hier mitlesen, sind unglaublich dankbar für deine Arbeit, die du hier postest.
Ganz besonders liebe ich deine Serifos Fotos, ich habe dieses Jahr 2 Wochen mit meiner Freundin dort verbracht (wir leben hier in Griechenland). Wundervolle Erinnerungen, aufgenommen durch deinen Blickwinkel.
Ein ganz, ganz großes Dankeschön an dich.
M.
Comment by M. — November 19, 2016 @ 8:47 amHave always loved your work since 2008, your photos always provide some sort of escape. I still think they’re the best. Sure it’s nice to still see familiar faces (like your dad! Who’s aging beautifully!) but there’s beauty in knowing many things have changed over the years. It only means you’re just having that human experience. Thank you for welcoming us into your life. It’s humbling when you really think about it. Love from Malaysia.
Comment by Sher — November 21, 2016 @ 12:47 amI could copy and paste your entire blog post (and replace photos with mine, quite mediocre ones).
Comment by Lenart Senica — November 26, 2016 @ 9:40 pmThose ten years flew by so quickly, blogs were big and died out, even fakebook seems a desert place these days. And I’m just not willing invest my efforts in instant services. Even though I’m a digital shooter I want my photographs to last. Even though I’m an introvert I want to explain myself. Even though I promised myself to let it go I am returning to my own blog. And even though I know it’s a finely curated presentation of my life – it is my life.
Thank you for your massive blog posts and unimaginable amount of time you dedicate to it. Appreciate it.
Eine starke Serie, insbesondere die Schwarz-Weiß Bilder gefallen mir gut.
Gerade der Analog-Look und teilweise Verschwommenheit der Bilder passt sehr gut.
Comment by Sebastian — December 4, 2016 @ 2:53 pm